Merry Christmas!!

Merry Christmas readers!

I hope it's alright I call you readers, since that's what you are. It just sounds cool, like tons of people are reading this. >.> Which I doubt they are, but still, I can hope.

I'm debating whether or not to tell me family about me, it's a tough decision. I think most people would be alright with it, since my cousin is also. I could also tell some more of my friends, but since most of them (like me) have a Christian upbringing, I'm not sure how they would take it. I don't want to risk anything, so I think I'll at least hold off on that for a while.

Had a good Christmas! For Christmas Eve we went to our grandparent's house, which was awesome (there's that word again!). One of my aunts was a...bit intoxicated, so her reaction was quite funny when my older cousin revealed she was pregnant. >.> They're like the perfect couple, my cousin and her hubby. She's gorgeous, he's a hunk, and they both look 20 years old when they're really 30.

I got a lot of money, which is always-you guessed it-awesome. I also got a carved, small wooden piano from my cousin in Texas, which is both random and cool. We got a PS3 from Dad, and two games for it from Mom. ^.^ She also ordered us Cataclysm, an expansion for World of Warcraft, which is an amazing game, but it has yet to come in. Dad got me a set of hot sauces, which look good. I think he really is trying, I'm just still not sure how to feel about him exactly...

One of the games is a Naruto one, which I am crazy over. I think I like that show a little too much, but I can't help it! The game is EXACTLY like the show, you could play it instead of watching the anime!

I don't focus enough on the true meaning of Christmas...I should more...I'm too superficial...

And to end it on that happy note.

Merry Christmas to all, and to all mashed potatoes!!!

Inner Dragon

I'm a bad person. v.v (who uses "awesome" way too much)

Well...I haven't blogged in forever...I'm horrible...feel free to throw chocolate covered fruits at me...preferably strawberries or cherries. Hopefully this big blog will make up for it...

Well...I told my brother about me. >_> We've been going through a lot of stuff lately, our parents are splitting up (yes, uninformed readers. I'm still working on the "revealing everything" part of this blog), so I wasn't sure it was the best time... He actually took it really well, "one more thing to add to the list" as he put it. He says it won't really change or effect anything, which I'm very happy about. I was honestly afraid he would hate me, or at least resent me or something, but he didn't...I'm very lucky to have him. Plus he makes amazing muffins, and gave me one earlier. <_< What can I say? I'm a sucker for food.

Speaking of food, we've been cooking more, which is awesome. What's even more awesome is that we'll be taking a trip soon with some of our friends up to our aunt's cabin and we'll all be cooking dinner and stuff together! Plus we can play hide and seek in the dark. ^.^ May I say for the record, anyone who doesn't like that game, or thinks it's too childish, we would love to play with you and prove you wrong. >.>

I'm also a sucker for my friends, I just adore spending time with them. The younger sister of two girls I know, she's only 13 years old people, wrote her own song on the piano...it's just amazing and beautiful, and much deeper than I could have imagined. She's so mature for her age, and she said she always feels "safe" around me. How sweet is that? As I told me brother, she is a gem. Anyone who doesn't think so better get to know her, that girl is an amazing person.

And another younger sibling-the little sister of my one and only past girlfriend, I might add-is also hilarious and fun to talk to. She's raising an army of vampire bunnies...you gotta love her. :P Why am I always drawn to the little kids? It must just be I'm more their maturity level...plus I like making them laugh.

Thanksgiving was epic, but Christmas time is approaching! Ah! I still need to order the presents for people! I have a feeling they'll be getting them late...I feel bad. I just keep forgetting to get dad to order them. And I need to get something for mom...any ideas would be wonderful.

Harry Potter 7 (part 1) is so incredibly perfect and AMAZING!!!!!!! *pantpantpant* OK, sorry, but it is. Plenty of humor despite the dark atmosphere. Great magic and action. I adore Hermione, if I could be any person from that series it would be her. Plus she had Krum after her at some point...gimme. <.< They captured the book perfectly, it's not even funny. Seriously, it's not, people die, stop smiling just because of the Krummy comment I made about Victor sKrumsish. -_-

Might I add the eye candy show....I mean Vampire Diaries, is probably my current favorite show, and has surpassed Twilight in my eyes. Don't worry Emmett! I'll always think you're a hunk! But sorry, you've got waaaay too much competition in this show. <.< Stefan and Damon, the main guys, are hot enough as it is. But the two football playing guys: the best friend of the main char, Matt, (big, buff, buzz cut-blonde) and the jerky werewolf, (short black hair, huge muscles, tan skin, sound familiar?) Tyler, are just.... *drool*.....pardon me. Plus, if you're looking for cute girls, look no further. Caroline (not sure on spelling) is gorgeous, plus she's very sweet. Bonnie is like...wow. Chocolate skin, big pretty eyes, and an attitude you do not want to get in the way of. Plus she's a witch, so that's awesome.

My oh my how the obsessed get distracted. Understandable though, it's a great show. AS IS MERLIN!!!! THE THIRD SEASON JUST ENDED!!!!! MORGANA IS AWFUL!!!! BUT ARTHUR IS GETTING TO BE MORE LIKE A KING!!!! IT'S AWESOME!!!!!......I use awesome way too much. Changing the title name.

Now, I could go on about the eye candy in Merlin, but I think that's enough for tonight. If you will notice, it's almost 3 in the morning here, after a long night of writing I wanted to write a "quick" blog before bed. Look how well that turned out. >_>


Aaaanyway, thanks for listening to my babble!


Inner Andrew/Andrew Dragon

Baaaaack from vacation!

Hiii.

Since I last posted, I've gone to a dance with my friends, which was awesome. >_> I've also been on a vacation to Disneyland, (which was the best) Magic Mountain, (which was also awesome) and Universal Studios (which wasn't as good as I thought it'd be). <_< And Harry Potter 7 is coming out tomorrow. We're going to the midnight showing, which we're having a party for. >_> I bet you all hate me now. <_<

Anywho, it was interesting to see Los Angeles, and how one minute you can be in a bunch of beautiful buildings, then be in an area with crappy stores and homeless people sleeping...it's probably a very hard life for them. I wish there was something I could do for people like that, but I don't know how to help them. Just giving them stuff wouldn't really help for more than a short while, but I don't know of a way to just give them jobs or houses...I went off on a little rant there, didn't I? >.>

My brother and I have started cooking a looot! ^.^ It's so much fun....we made brownies, from scratch....SUCCESSFUL brownies!! We made muffins too, but they're not as good. We made pasta for night to dinner, which isn't as impressive, but was very good.

If any of you care, I'm not sure whether to sign my messages as "Andrew", or "Inner Dragon". Tell me which you think I should use, if anyone reads this.

Dorkily yours,

Andrew/Inner Dragon

I'm baaaack!

Happy.

I have returned. >.> From the land of hope and wonder. <.< BTW, for those who haven't, look up Charlie the Unicorn on Youtube. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q5im0Ssyyus     2 and 3 are good as well.

Merlin is an AWESOME show. Just watched the latest one. Look it up if you want, but if you need the link to the show online, I has it. <.< The show has a lot of veeeery attractive people, both guys and girls. Morgana may be the most beautiful woman on the planet. Arthur is, of course, a total hunk, and Merlin is just adorable with his silly smile. Great show, lots of humor, great magic and action (I have a few of the spells memorized), and an all around great show. Vampire Diaries is also amazing, and also has much eye candy. Damon Salvatore...how about salivate? Talk about male model. Plus Stefan Salvatore would make a better (and sexier) Edward than Robert Pattinson any day. And the girls too, they're simply gorgeous. Bonnie is be ee ay utiful, and so is Elaina (sp).

We had a great time at the cabin, played this game called "Minecraft", it's slightly addictive. Also played the Eragon video game...which is surprisingly good considering the movie sucked. The books are fantastic.

I love my mom...I'm just able to talk with her to freely, she is definitely one of my best friends. It's so different from my dad. She's always been there, he never was, she talked to me about everything, he only talked to me when he had no other choice. Mom's spent time with us, taken an interest in what we do. She likes our music, she asks about what's going on in our lives, she even plays our video games a little bit. I'm just able to hop up onto the counter and talk with her, and yes, the image of an 18 year old hopping up on a counter IS funny. -.-

Anyway, just letting you know Mom's #1. >.> I don't really think that could ever change...she knows about me, and she's OK with it. I think that was the final thing for me, that I can trust her with anything because she loves me unconditionally. That might be one of the biggest problems in this world, people don't love one another at all, they could care less what happened to others. I really hope I'll never be like that, and with my mom to inspire me, I don't think I will.

...freaked out at how sort of deep that was.

Andrew

Latin

Happy/excited.

I'm having a Latin class right now. >.> I can't study until I know where I start though, so it's all right. We're going to our aunt's cabin pretty soon after the lesson...it's so nice there...so much cooler and just more relaxing. We're going to be bringing our PS2 this time, not the semi-broken one they have up there.

One of the reasons I like it there is that my dad isn't there...it's just like I can't be comfortable when he's around. It's not that I don't love him, I do...but we don't really have any sort of relationship. We don't really do anything fun, or if we do it feels like I'm not doing it because I want to. And I don't have fun because I'm with him, which to me is a big part of what any relationship should be. You should be able to have fun doing nothing, because you like the person so much it doesn't matter what you're doing. I feel guilty feeling like this about him...but it's just like he's...boring. There's nothing there, nothing that makes me want to do anything or spend time with him. Maybe it's just that we never did anything together when I was younger, and the fact that he's trying now that I'm an adult just feels...too late. I don't even know if I want a relationship with him anymore, or what kind of relationship we could even have. We're similar in some ways, and I look very very similar to him, but we have none of the same interests. I think of him as a piece of furniture in the house, just...there. Anything I do with him, I'd rather do with mom, or my brother, or anyone else...I think I resent him for never spending time with me, talking with me, doing ANY thing with me when I was a kid.

I sort of feel guilty for how I view him, how I feel for him, but I'm glad I at least got it off my chest. Thank you for listening, readers.

Andrew

Thoughtful

Park

Content. (my friend told me to put down my mood at the start and end of the blogs)

Greetings. We go to a park on most Wednesdays, to hang out with our friends. Today I talked with a friend of mine about ghost stuff, and reaching a more psychic state of mind. I really don't believe in that kind of stuff, but I tried it anyway. Nothing really supernatural happened, but since she said to try to use a memory that would make me feel emotional...I did.

I pictured myself in a black expanse, my mind. There were two paths to either side of me, the left one to a cross, the right to a computer. I started walking toward toward the computer path, but someone was screaming from the other path...it was my imaginary character Neb, the one that personifies the light in me. He was hanging on to the ledge of a pit, yelling for me to help him. I went to the edge of the pit and just stared down at him, my eyes glinting red...until he fell. Then I lifted my head and roared, my head turning more reptilian...

It scared me frankly, because I'm always afraid that's how my life will turn out...I'll be a monster...

Andrew

Depressed...

Muuusic.

It's amazing the affect awesome music can have. Even if it IS dorky or weird. Britney Spears, Three Days Grace, Nickelback, Katy Perry (only like one of her songs, Teenage Dream, though).....I have a bit of a mixed selection. Those aren't even all my favorites, I might post those somewhere else. Maybe on my profile or About Me page.

Had an interesting dream last night. I copy/pasted this from a chat with Pearl over skype. I was walking inside some kind of building, don't know why, where, or what it was. There were a bunch of emergency exits installed by some guy who was paranoid I think. I picked one, went out of it, to find a car driving more on the sidewalk than the road, and swerved out of the way of me just in time. Fun times! *shudder* No alarms for these doors by the way. I went back inside, which was somewhere now a long, concrete hallway, (in most cases I would complain "why can't my dream stay more consistent", but not this time >.>) and I walked down it. I take another door (this one on my left, unlike the other one) and wind up in a fairly small bathroom with a few stalls. All three were occupied, but then the outer two people leave, leaving two guys in the middle stall kissing.

Anyway, I go in the stall to the right. I must have stood up on the toilet or something because I was right above the two of them. I literally start poking them so I can tell them I'm gay too. Like that would work in real life. They'd probably be like "...ok, that's nice, now could you leave us alone?". They pretty much ignore me, but another guy comes in. I must thank my subconscious now for making him very cute. Thank you subconscious. ^.^ I walk up behind him and put my arms around him......why can't I be this confident in real life?.....although doing THAT in real life would most likely get me beat up or killed. As I'm holding him, a friend of mine, Alyssa's older sister Pearl, walks in (to the men's room, I might add, shaaaame ;P) and says "dibs". I felt like saying "too late", but instead I check my phone, seeing it's like 6:15pm or something, therefor getting late....then my alarm goes off. v.v

I have never been the "five more minutes type", but come on! That's one of the first more normal dreams like that I've had though....in dreams I normally am more confident, whether because I know it's a dream, or my mind isn't very clear, so caution is thrown to the wind. Frankly I was a bit surprised when Pearl walked in....as guilty as I am to say it, I don't usually have dreams with my friends in them. I wish I did, it'd be cool...though a bit odd if I start thinking what happened in the dreams really happened.

Anyway, I should blog more at some point. >.>

Bye for now readers...if I have more than one, that is. <.<

Andrew

History

This blog will be about me, Andrew, and my life. I don't know how often I'll blog, but I'll try my best to keep you updated. I'm a homeschooled, 18 year old, dorky person. My About Me page has more. I'm a gay Christian. Am I also a critical hippo? Yes. I think choosing that lifestyle is wrong, but I'm human, and I'm weak. I've never done anything with another guy, just so you know, but I've certainly thought about it. I've been raised a Christian all my life by my awesome mom, and believe completely in the Bible and that Jesus is my Savior. My dad was pretty distant most of my life, and is only just now making an effort to get closer to me, which isn't completely welcome. I don't believe in evolution, and I don't believe that I was born this way. I do think I could be more inclined to that sort of lifestyle than other people, but not because of something in my DNA. I've only had one girlfriend, and it was a while ago. Nothing more than one kiss happened, and we've since grown fairly distant. I have an awesome best friend named Alyssa, who I tell pretty much everything to. I have other friends, but I'm not as close to them, and not many know my secret. My parents know, my brother doesn't. The purpose of this blog is to sort of get everything out there, to let everything go. As it gets into a day by day or week by week thing, it'll be more current, but I wanted to let you know a little about my past.


Enjoy,


Andrew